


Storytime

by chocolatula, dnitegirl, gloatingraccoon, liasangria



Category: Homestuck
Genre: All protagonists also appear in drag and that's no big deal, Arthurian, At least if you're not Eridan because he makes a big deal out of everything, Celtic Mythology & Folklore, Collaboration, Cute Kids, F/M, Fairy Tale Retellings, Gen, Homestuck Shipping World Cup, Humanstuck, Illustrated, M/M, Multi, Playing Pretend
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-08-31
Updated: 2013-08-31
Packaged: 2017-12-26 13:10:07
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 2,229
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/966307
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/chocolatula/pseuds/chocolatula, https://archiveofourown.org/users/dnitegirl/pseuds/dnitegirl, https://archiveofourown.org/users/gloatingraccoon/pseuds/gloatingraccoon, https://archiveofourown.org/users/liasangria/pseuds/liasangria
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A young Eridan, Feferi and Sollux each tell their own version of the tale of King Arthur.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. > Enter name.

**Author's Note:**

> Here's Team Eridan/Feferi/Sollux's entry for the Collab Round of the Homestuck Shipping World Cup. The theme was Mythology.  
> \- Text by [gloatingraccoon](http://archiveofourown.org/users/gloatingraccoon/profile) with edits by [dnitegirl](http://archiveofourown.org/users/dnitegirl/profile).  
> \- Chapter 1 art by [chocolatula](http://archiveofourown.org/users/chocolatula/profile).  
> \- Chapter 2 art by [madmaxart](http://madmaxart.tumblr.com).  
> \- Chapter 4 art by [dnitegirl](http://archiveofourown.org/users/dnitegirl/profile).  
> \- Chapter 6 and 8 art by [liasangria](http://archiveofourown.org/users/liasangria/profile).
> 
> A note from gloatingraccoon: sorry guys, apparently I can't add you as co-authors without an AO3 account, and also apparently I can't get rid of the "chapter by..." message in individual chapters. Although for some reason this message does not appear in Chapter 2? I have no idea. I give up.

  
      

Your name is Sollux Captor and you are 10 years old.

It's one of those endless summer evenings and you're spending it at the park with your gang, today only consisting of two of your friends, Feferi and Eridan, since your best buddy Karkat apparently has been grounded (again) and your cousin Aradia is at the seaside for the holidays. You're starting to think you ate too much at lunch because you're almost dozing off, when you notice Eridan frowning while fiddling with that silly toy seahorse he brings everywhere. You just know he's about to complain about something and demand attention, because he's just that much of a spoiled brat (FF instead is totally cool and crazy fun to be with). Sometimes you wonder how you two are still friends, really.

"I'm bored!" Eridan exclaims. "Why don't we do somethin'?"

You roll your eyes. The little prince has spoken, now the world had better solve his problem. Far be it for him to propose anything.

"We could go to my place and play games on the Xbox," you offer, and Eridan gags.

"No way! Your games are so dumb."

"More like I always beat you," you say with a grin, and Eridan's starting to object, but Feferi cuts both of you out with a huff.

"C'mon, guys, cut it out for once! How about we do something we all like? We haven't played pretend in _forever_ , let's do that!"

"True, but..." Eridan starts, then stops abruptly and gives you an embarrassed look. You have a feeling you're making more or less the same face, and maybe you know why. To anyone else, you'd reply that playing pretend is for little kids, but this is FF we're talking about, and she's the exception to the rule because only losers would make fun of her, and playing pretend with her is a blast. Playing anything with her is a blast, really, so you do the only thing you can do: you shrug off your embarrassment and for once, you give Eridan a hand.

"... but we need a good idea, right?" you chime in, and Eridan nods enthusiastically. "Well... we can do a story about King Arthur! I read it last week and it's so cool."

"Arthurian legends are awesome! But you're sure you read it? You didn't just play some dumb inaccurate fantasy game?" Eridan rolls his eyes with a smirk.

"Oh shut up!" you say, deliberately avoiding the question because you're just that smooth. "Now, I am going to be Arthur, FF is Lancelot... and you can be Guinevere!"

Eridan almost chokes at that, flushing right up to his ears, and you snicker.

"What! No way, I can't be Guinevere, I'm a boy in case you didn't notice!"

"Oh come on, Eridan, I play boys' parts all the time, what's the problem?" Feferi says with a pout, tugging playfully at his clothes. "You even look pretty in dresses!"

"But --FEF!"

This time Eridan turns outright eggplant violet in the face and his voice sounds much more like a panicked squeak than a shout, but it's all useless, you're already doubling over between snorts and chuckles. FF doesn't seem to get what's so funny and just keeps giving Eridan the puppy dog eyes treatment, which is another thing you like about her: Eridan can be such a pain sometimes, but he's like putty in her hands. Just like you thought, he regains his composure soon enough, wriggling his hands.

"Um... if you say so, Fef."

Man. This is going to be fun.

 **> Everybody: play Sollux's tale.**


	2. > Everybody: play Sollux's tale.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Text by [gloatingraccoon](http://archiveofourown.org/gloatingraccoon/profile), art by [madmaxart](http://madmaxart.tumblr.com).

Once upon a time, in the faraway land of Britannia, there lived a legendary adventurer known as King Arthur. He was not only a great warrior, but a Half-Elf and a powerful mage who could pull swords out of stones and move mountains with his powers. Along with his group of Paladins of the Round Table, he united his kingdom and kept the peace, slaying monsters and evil mages whenever his people called for help.

His very best friend among his loyal Paladins was Sir Lancelot, who was the bravest and most fearsome warrior in all Britannia, even better than Arthur himself. Lancelot had grown up with the fairies and had the power to heal the wounded, and he was so kind that everybody liked him. He also looked very pretty in plate armor, and even in dresses.

  
  
Arthur liked him very much and he often said he was so lucky to have Lancelot on his side. But the Queen Guinevere, who was Arthur's girlfriend, also liked Lancelot and sometimes she got very annoying and jealous.  
 

[ ](http://team-erifefsol-collab.dreamwidth.org/557.html)

  
So when the evil Morgan Le Fay kidnapped her, instead of falling into an obvious trap by going to rescue her, Arthur decided he might as well leave her there and be happy with Lancelot instead.

 

  
So Guinevere married the witch, and Arthur and Lancelot went off adventuring and lived happily ever after. THE END.  
 

**> Eridan: teach this guy his place.** [  
](http://team-erifefsol-collab.dreamwidth.org/557.html)


	3. > Eridan: teach this guy his place.

You are now Eridan Ampora, and you can see that Fef's look of disappointment probably mirrors your own. Except she's deadly cute when she pouts like that, and you are not. You are handsome and intimidating instead. Probably.

"Aww, but... it's not very heroic to leave Guinevere like that!" Fef says, and Sollux's grin drops. "Can't we do some other ending?"

"Tell you what, we can do another tale entirely!" you say, crossing your arms. "Seriously, Sol? Half elves? Magic and fairies? That was completely inaccurate, I knew you just played some stupid rpg!"

"Oh come on, we were having fun!" Sollux frowns.

"Yeah, sure," you roll your eyes, "but this time we're gonna do it my own way, that is much more interestin' and fun! And this time I'm gonna play Arthur, Fef Guinevere and you Lancelot, and nobody is gonna wear dresses!" You catch Fef's puzzled expression, and you clear your throat. "Uh, unless you, Fef. If you really wanna, you know."

The return of Sol's smirk surprises you.

"Ok then. Lead on, great war hero."

Oh, this is so on.

**> Everybody: play Eridan's tale.**


	4. > Everybody: play Eridan's tale.

Once upon a time, in the faraway land of Britannia, there lived a legendary war leader known as King Arthur. Through clever use of military tactics and political alliances, he united his kingdom against the Saxon invasion and kept the peace, aided by his faithful group of Knights of the Round Table who obeyed his every order.

  
Guinevere was Arthur's wife and the daughter of king Leodegrance, one of the first to acknowledge Arthur's rule. Even if their marriage was a political one, Arthur loved her very much because she was very sweet and brave, and she also looked very pretty in dresses, or in whatever she liked to wear, even when she slept in her old nightrobe with her mouth open. Guinevere also liked him a lot because she admired his tactical skills and ambition, and also he looked quite dashing in his armor and cape, especially with his horse prancing.

 

  
Unfortunately this was not going to last, because soon Lancelot entered the picture. Lancelot was one of the Knights of the Round Table, and while brave and valiant, he had a rebellious character, often challenging Arthur into duels and claiming nonsense such as magic and fairies were real. Lancelot also liked the Queen very much, which was understandable as she was so sweet and nice, and she liked him in turn, because she disliked no one.

 

  
Lancelot, however, wanted to convince the Queen to run away with him.

  
Arthur's enemies found out about this and decided to use it to their own advantage, sparking divisions within the Round Table. When Lancelot's plans were revealed, he ran away, and Arthur was forced to burn Guinevere at the stake.

 **> Feferi: take matters into your own hands.**


	5. > Feferi: take matters into your own hands.

You are now Feferi Peixes and you are completely blown away by this shocking plot twist. Well, not really. But you just blink a couple of times, too puzzled to react at first, before you stop pretending to be tied to the pretend stake you were going to be pretend burned at. 

"Ok Eridan, this story is getting really weird if you ask me!" you say, crossing your arms to stare Eridan down, because really, someone has to do it (frequently). And you happen to be pretty good at it, at least judging from how Eridan visibly shrinks at your displeasure. 

"Yeah, more like this story fucking blows!" Sollux says. You wish he didn't curse this much, he's going to get himself grounded like Karcrab if he's not careful around his dads. "It's ridiculous, why the hell should Arthur do such a horrible thing to Guinevere if he likes her?" 

"Oh come on, guys, of course it was all a clever tactic to draw Lancelot out of hiding!" Eridan's expression quickly goes from upset to desperate. "Get it, so that he comes to rescue her, and then Arthur goes to fight him? Of course he wouldn't really burn her at the stake, it all goes well in the end!" 

"That's so dumb," Sollux says, scowling. 

"Listen, you..." Eridan starts, but you don't let him finish. You've seen this show way too many times. 

"Okay, that's enough!" you say, moving between them before they start getting really stupid ideas. "You know what? I think you both got the story wrong, and I think I know why! I have another idea, and I bet this time we're really going to have fun, all three of us! Only, this time I'll be Arthur, Eridan can be Lancelot and Sollux Guinevere. What do you say?" 

You don't miss Eridan's gleeful grin, and the way it's directed at Sollux, who shrugs and grins back, as if they were challenging each other, but you pretend not to notice. Really, they are such idiots sometimes, but they are your dearest friends and you wouldn't have them any other way (well, to be fair, you wouldn't mind if they learnt to behave at least a little, let's face it). 

"Sure thing, FF." 

"You start, Fef." 

**> Everybody: play Feferi's tale.**


	6. > Everybody: play Feferi's tale.

Once upon a time, in the faraway land of Britannia, there lived a legendary hero known as King Arthur. Helped by his loyal group of Knights of the Round Table, he united his kingdom and kept the peace, and he wanted nothing more than help his people and right the wrongs of the land. He was kind and listened to everyone, but he knew to be firm and stern with wrongdoers and underhanded people.

  
Two of the most important people for Arthur were Guinevere and Lancelot. Guinevere was his wife, and she was very clever and sweet, even if she was too proud to admit it, while Lancelot was the bravest of his Knights, and he was also very sweet, even if he was too proud to admit it. Arthur liked them both very much, and they liked him in turn, and he often said he was so lucky to have them on his side. Unfortunately both Guinevere and Lancelot were very stubborn and they didn't want to admit they also liked each other, and sometimes got very annoying and jealous.  


  
So when the evil Morgan Le Fay kidnapped Guinevere, and Lancelot suggested that they leave her be and go off conquering new territory without her, Arthur decided he'd had enough.  


Knowing he could trust Lancelot to help him, they went together to Morgan Le Fay's fortress and vanquished her, and once free, Guinevere helped them find the witch's treasure. Arthur then hugged both Guinevere and Lancelot and told them that their fighting was stupid: it made no sense for him to choose between them, since they were both so important to him. They just had to find something to do together that would make all of them happy.

  
So Arthur, Lancelot and Guinevere went off adventuring, conquering and righting the wrongs of the land together, and lived happily ever after. THE END.

  
**> Feferi: shut up those two silly fishy faces.**  



	7. > Feferi: shut up those two silly fishy faces.

"Hey, I don't like HIM!" 

"We're like, TOTALLY different!" 

Sollux and Eridan snap incredulously almost at the same time, and you think they sound awfully similar and spend quite a lot of time together for two guys who don't like each other. But you waste no time in explanations and just cut them off in a big hug, which they soon return, even if they're grumbling because they are just that stupid. Boys! 

"Oh come on, of course you do! We're all friends, right? And you have to admit it, that whole jealousy story was really stupid. Why all this fighting if they can just be all together?" 

You squeeze them tight, smiling at each of them, and you're delighted to see them smile back, and not one of those mean or forced grins, but a real smile. They almost never smile that way, and they're awfully cute when they do. 

"Well it was kinda dumb, yeah." 

"Yeah FF, your idea was better." 

"Great!" You giggle, jumping between them excitedly (which leaves them wobbling, but whatever). "What do we do now?" 

**> Everybody: live happily ever after.**


	8. > Everybody: live happily ever after.

That's quite a lot to do for three kids on a summer evening! We all need to settle down here.

Getting ice cream, however, is as good a way as any to get started.

**  
>The End.**


End file.
